The Battle of the Bulge and the Strength of Community.

Ah weight issues, my old nemesis. 

Yet again we meet. 

 I saw you just this morning as I walked passed my mirror and was determined not to acknowledge your presence.

I almost could pretend that you didn't whisper in my ear as I ate a muffin.

I nearly ignored you completely as I tried on a new dress. 

You keep showing your ugly face, your sneer and hateful words are expected and put up with on many days, despite how much I would rather tell you to piss off.

I hate you and you scare me, but for some reason I have put up with you for so many years that I am not sure how I would be without you anymore.

But I am learning.

Last week I stood in front of several groups of people whose eyes told me that they knew you intimately.

In those groups your presence was very much alive and well.

And yet it was in those very places, where I expected you to be strongest, you were at your weakest.

Somehow, as we looked at each other and talked about you, it was there that you failed to have control.

There you were named properly and seen for what you really are; something that can be defeated and controlled.

I saw your influence and at the same time I saw your weakness.

These fighters are not giving up.

I do not fight you alone.'

We shall overcome.

It Is Well With My Soul

Since my last blog ("OK I'm TERRIFIED"), which was less than 24 hours ago (!!!), I have had such an overwhelming response that I need to say a few things about it.

First of all THANK YOU to the amazing people who have made me feel more supported than I ever have in my entire life. I need to thank these people in name but please READ what has happened coz some of it is mind blowing.

Lucy Darymple: On Sunday (before I posted my blog) Lucy was at church and felt God telling her to give me a gym membership. Lucy was like "oh hells no, how do you tell a big person that they have to get their arse to the gym coz God said so and NOT offend them in the process?"

The next day I blogged.

Today she offered me a gym membership which I totally couldn't afford. I am so blessed by this that I am tearing up as I write. Thank you Lucy, you're amazingly epic.

Kent Hartmann, Fiona Sherwin, and Sam Tanner: for messaging such lovely comments to support and encourage me. I loved it!!

Shinai Goodwin: for ALWAYS being a rock for me and encouraging me. You are an amazingly beautiful woman.

Nick and Melissa Kalavati: for being the fittest people I know and never making me feel fat and lazy when I am with them. But immediately stepping up to the plate to help me out when I needed it.

With all this love and support there is no way I can fail!!

I would also like to mention the number of people who have said that my last post motivated them to get healthy.

Knowing that other people struggle (even the skinny ones) to be healthy and stay that way is so much help!

I don't feel alone in this at all any more and I just needed you to know how much love I feel from you all.

Blessings xxxx